All monologues are property and copyright of their owners. Monologues are presented on MightyActor for educational purposes only .
A monologue from the play by Mia Chung
TIFFANY (late thirties)
Tiffany tells her friend Junhee about her date last night.
When I did graveyard, I thought that was why I couldn’t meet anyone. But even with eHarmony, PlentyofFish, match.com and okCupid, I still can’t find Mr. Right, the light of my life, Prince Charming, my soul mate.
I went on a date last night . . . Disaster. Date from hell. Heinous snafu fiasco. A hot mess. He was late, spilled wine, called me Gina twice, didn’t laugh at my jokes, hasn’t returned my voicemail or email or friend request or text.
I’m really not choosy. All I want is someone nice. Who’s honest and funny, works out at least four days a week. Someone who doesn’t pinch pennies. Can make conversation. Has beautiful eyes or feet.
Likes dogs not cats. Who’s handy or knows his way around a kitchen. Reads books. Isn’t an only child. World traveler. Graduated from NYU—equivalent or better. Who likes me.
I’m learning to stay positive, ask questions, step back and let go. I was feeling blocked, cluttered. So I got a book on simple living, did a cleanse, stripped down my closet And then I discovered all the shoes I had were crap.
I’m on my feet all day. And in this city, you need good shoes. They have to be sensible and stylish and feel good and last a long time and go with every outfit, work or play. I definitely need new shoes.
Everyone in this city has this problem. And what do we do with all the crappy expensive shoes?! So stupid. So wasteful. So not me. Not anymore. You wonder how it all fit in your closet, your budget, your life? Am I right?
Check out our monologue archive below for more monologues.