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A monologue from the play by Merridith Allen
ROBYN (twenty seven – thirty two)
Robyn is a sex lit writer and columnist who has decided that she needs to educate her two roommates about how to pick a potential boyfriend.
“The compatibility trifecta.” There are three key factors which will help determine how a man will act. The first factor is p*rn. Yes, it may be uncomfortable for you, the potential love interest, to immediately dive into your potential mate’s p*rn collection.
However, his sexual habits, stamina and personality are all reflected through his p*rn. (She looks over to LUCAS, who is chewing. She swats at him.) Lucas, are you chewing gum? Spit it out.
Anyway, the second factor is friends. Get to know his friends, and you get to know the side of himself that you may not see or know or come across otherwise. Friends have all the right character revealing stories.
Lastly, look at his habits. This is an extension of factor one, but includes both sexual and non sexual habits. Things such as masturbation frequency, diet, exercise, sleep cycle, work schedule, hobbies and past relationship patterns all fit into this category.
After a thorough investigation, if the result is pleasing, then go ahead, hop into bed with the guy.
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