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A monologue from the play by Brandon Jacob Jenkins
There this girl who works here – Vanessa? She one of them girls that has Witherspoon face. You know how some white girls just randomly be looking like Reese Witherspoon?
Vanessa be getting so mad when I say that though. She be like, ‘Shawn, that is racist! All white people do not look alike!’
And I’m like, B*tch, it’s not racist if I say you look famous. I mean, it’s only racist if I say you look like some basic run-of-the-mill white chick, you know?
There’s a difference. I mean people be mistaking me for somebody else all the time. And that’s the sh*t that be getting me mad, you know?
That’s when I’m like, All black people do not look alike, you know what I mean? It’s like No, I’m not the guy who mowed your dad’s lawn.
And no, I’m not your student from the year you did Teach for America! That’s different. Vanessa just be so sensitive.
It’s not like I mistook her for Reese Witherspoon. It’s not like I tapped her on the shoulder and was like, ‘Reese Witherspoon, is that you?’
I just said she look like Reese Witherspoon, because she got a Witherspoon face. I mean, it would be different if somebody mistook me for somebody famous once in a while.
That would be nice. But that, like, never happens.
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