Hello Herman – Monologue (Herman)

A monologue from the play by John Buffalo Mailer

Herman is speaking to a journalist who is interviewing him on death row three days before he will be executed for the mass murder of 39 students and 4 adults.

Herman Howards (sixteen)

I shot her at an angle, so the bullet would go through her skull and blood would splatter all over Marsha.

That b*tch walked around those halls like she owned the place, And why? Because she was a nice-looking piece of a**?

You think that’s gonna fly in the new order?! Sh*t’s going down, Lax. Being some sweet piece of a** or some hotshot reporter don’t cut it anymore. 

It’s the ones like me are going to run the show . Do you know what the largest generation is? Mine. We have more than the baby boomers.

Sing of the Eternal Moment
Sing of the Eternal Moment

So, you can believe me when I tell you we’re going to do a hell of a lot more than “Rock the Vote”.

More and more kids are going to realize that this is the only way to make you a**holes finally pay attention to us.

And when they do, watch out. I made damn sure to kill more people than that wackjob Cho. You know why?

Because you have to reset the precedent . When Harris and Klebold lit up Columbine, the nation freaked out,

But people didn’t freak our when that kid brought a gun into his school in Georgia, back in June ‘99. 

TJ . Solomon was his name. You know why people didn’t freak out? ‘Cause he only wounded six students.

He didn’t even kill anybody . People looked at that incident and all they said was ‘’At least it’s not as bad as Columbine ”. 

Not with me, Lax, I wasn’t about to settle for some rinky-dink sh*t. Oh, no. I blew that dumb b*tch’s head off and made sure a little got on James Hankley as well. 

But I was never going to kill him, I wanted him to live, so he could write about the day in his precious paper. Marsha on the other hand, she didn’t have a chance. 

Read the play here